Learning To Honor

by Lydia Schaeffer - TOA Director

Last December, while our older children were out of school for the month, we sent them to stay for a week with the parents of our Assistant Director, Eli Kiwelu, in the village of Marangu, about 45 minutes from the town of Moshi. For one week, the three older boys, Benny, Innocent and Emanueli, stayed with Eli’s parents. After they returned, we sent our older girls - Irene, Margaret and Sifaeli to stay for a week. We had several reasons for sending them to spend a full week outside of the children’s home. Primarily, it was to give them the opportunity to get away and enjoy time with Eli’s parents who have now become like grandparents to all the children. Secondarily, we know that it is important to keep the children familiar with traditional African village living.

Staying in rural Marangu village on the slopes of Mt. Kilimanjaro is not a week of relaxation and play. Because Eli’s parents are in their 60’s, they can use all the help they can get. During their week in Marangu, the children spent their days milking the cows, collecting firewood, working the farm, fetching water from the river, cooking the food, washing the laundry (by hand), feeding the animals, cleaning the animal pens, and visiting many of the neighbors with Eli’s father who is a pastor, doing house to house evangelism.

This past month the children have been on summer recess from school. Eli and I were standing outside one day, talking about the possibility of sending the older children back to Marangu for a week during their school break. The older girls were sitting nearby as we were talking. They overheard the conversation and quickly told us that they did not want to go back to Marangu for another week because the work is very hard.

I knew it was hard work for them, but I also knew how much they blessed Eli’s parents with their company and their help. Instead of insisting that they return or bribing them with money or a gift to get them to go back, I decided to have a talk with them about honor and respect. We talked about Eli and how much they love and respect him. I explained that the sacrifice they make by working so hard is also a way of honoring Eli because they are showing love and respect towards his parents. Immediately after hearing this statement, Irene stood up and said, “We must go.” Then all three girls stood up and hugged Eli and told him that they loved him. “We are going,” they decided.

It blesses me so much when I think how our teenage girls understand the importance of showing respect to adults. They have grasped the concept that honor is not something to be taken lightly. These girls were willing to sacrifice their own comforts in order to bless Eli, simply because they wanted to honor him. I thank the Lord that although many of our children have biological fathers that abandoned them, their Heavenly Father watches over them continuously. The Lord has brought adults into their lives that genuinely love them and through those relationships, they have learned to be children who honor their parents.

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